Catherine, Queen of Kohlandia

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Her Majesty
Catherine the First
Queen of Kohlandia

Queen of Kohlandia
Reign 30 August 2019; 10 months ago (2019-08-30)
Coronation None
Throne established
Successor Crown Princess Elizabeth
Wife Empress Jennifer of Jennytopia
House House of Robinson
Father HM King Emeritus Philip, Queen's Father
Mother HM Queen Emeritus Ann, Queen's Mother
Born 20 September 1980 (1980-09-20) (age 39)
Flag of the United Kingdom.png Durham
Religion Wicca

HM Queen Catherine the First is the first Monarch of Kohlandia and founder of the kingdom. Her reign has been marked by the rapid development of Kohlandia, the establishment of many international treaties, the writing of the Kohlandian Constitution, and the development of the legal system.

Outside of her duties as Queen, Catherine is a professional writer, cartoonist, filmmaker and political commentator.

Early life

Political Career

Catherine has long been a political activist and politician in the United Kingdom. She assisted her father in delivering leaflets for the Labour Party in North East England as a teenager, then became involved in student politics while attending Durham University. She later joined the Conservative party as an activist and won election to her local Council in 2015[1]. She remains a member of the Conservative party to this day.

Founding of Kohlandia

Royal Family of Kohlandia
Coat of Arms of the Kohlandian Royal Family

In 2019, Catherine grew increasingly frustrated with the behaviour of the British Parliament. After three years of attempting to subvert, curtail or block Brexit, Parliament outright refused to call a General Election despite the opposition parties repeatedly clamouring for one in the media. Catherine viewed this as a demonstration of how the Parliamentary system could be so easily used to damage democracy, when left in the wrong hands. Her solution was to form a direct democratic system, to determine whether removing the Parliamentary bottleneck using modern technology to give legislative control to the citizenry would make for a better system.[2]

Catherine founded the Kingdom of Kohlandia on this principle. She created the nation as a simulationist micronation; in order to determine whether her theories on direct democracy could actually function. To avoid the possibility of a "tyranny of the majority" undermining the rights of minorities, and to maintain a similarity with the systems of the United Kingdom, Catherine set up Kohlandia as a constitutional monarchy. In a significant departure to how the British system works, she created a written constitution for Kohlandia.

In further reinforcement of her distain for Parliament's frustration of the Brexit process, and also to underline her views on how the European Union was created in a highly underhand manner, Catherine described the simulationist Kohlandia as "just as legitimate as the EU" in her weekly politics show, The News Review.[3] During this episode of the show, Catherine also explained her decision to reign as Queen Catherine the First because "there hasn't been a Queen Zoë since the Bronze Age".

Personal life

Bibliography

Catherine has written, co-written, edited, art directed and provided the artwork for a number of books, newsletters and graphic novels. Her selected bibliography includes:

  • SLNN Next, Newspaper (Art Director)
  • LSQ, Newsletter (Editor and contributing writer)
  • Unholy Crusade, Novella (Author)
  • The Collected Life of Nob T. Mouse: Book 1, Graphic Novel (Artist, Co-Writer)
  • All Over the House: Book 1, Graphic Novel (Artist, Co-Writer)
  • All Over the House: Book 2, Graphic Novel (Artist, Co-Writer)
  • All Over the House: Book 3, Graphic Novel (Artist, Co-Writer)

Filmography

Catherine has written, directed and starred in a number of films, web shows and plays. No copies of her earliest roles are known to still exist but many others are available online, either in whole or in part. She has a Bacon Number of 3 thanks to her supporting actress role in Dunorilus alongside main actor James Heatlie, who went on to a role in Batman Begins[4].

Her selected filmography includes:

Title Year Role(s) Written By Directed By Notes
Star Trek? 1999 "Klingon Commander" Queen Catherine Queen Catherine Play
Dunorilus: Kingdom in Flames 2001 "Good General" Chris Maudsley Chris Maudsley Independent Film
The Nobmouse Show 2009-2016 Host Queen Catherine Queen Catherine Web TV Show
The Vlog (formerly The Zog) 2012-Present Primary subject N/A Queen Catherine Video Diary
The Locket 2014 "Woman" Queen Catherine Queen Catherine Independent Film
To My Beloved 2015 Cathy Stone Queen Catherine Queen Catherine Independent Film
How To Make A Film 2015 Erin Flox Queen Catherine Queen Catherine Independent Film
GameHammer 2015-Present Host Queen Catherine Queen Catherine Web TV Show
The Crown Jewels Caper 2018 "The Muscle" Princess Esme Queen Catherine Independent Film
GameHammer Daily 2018-2019 Host Queen Catherine Queen Catherine Web TV Show

Podcasts

Catherine also hosts, or has hosted, a number of podcasts over the years. A selection of these are listed below:

Title Year Topic
Zoë and Jenny at the Weekend 2010-2012 News and current events
T-Vox Podcasts 2010-2012 LGBT issues
The News Review 2019- News and current events
Hammercast Gaming Podcast 2020- Modern and retro gaming

Titles, styles, honours and arms

Titles and styles

Queen Catherine's full style, reflecting her founding of the Royal Family of Kohlandia on 30 August 2019, is relatively short. As part of Kohlandian law and custom, she is Sovereign of all the orders of honour granted by Kohlandia, but hold none of those honours herself regardless of any that are or could have been granted. Queen Catherine is also Queen Consort to Empress Jennifer of Jennytopia, and this is reflected in her style.

She is known as Her Majesty Queen Catherine the First, Queen of Kohlandia, Queen Consort of Jennytopia, Founder of Kohlandia, Sovereign of the Order of Excellence, Sovereign of the Order of the Gryphon, Grand Marshall of the Army, Grand Marshall of the Air Force, Grand Admiral of the Navy, Grand Admiral of the Space Force, Bachelor of Science, Bachelor of Laws.

Honours and Awards

Under Kohlandian law and custom, it is not possible for the Monarch to be bestowed with any Kohlandian honour for which the Crown is Sovereign. Kohlandia currently does not provide any system of honour outside of the Order of the Gryphon, Kohlandia's highest honour, and the Order of Excellence save for the process of Parliament awarding honorary citizenships; for which Kohlandian citizens are not eligible. As a result, Queen Catherine does not currently hold any granted honours.

HM Queen Catherine was awarded Dime Micronationalist of the Month for October 2019 for her work in rapidly developing Kohlandia and establishing a number of international treaties.

Arms

Queen Catherine bears the Kohlandian Royal Coat of Arms.

Ancestry

Catherine's family line has been traced back to the Plantagenet Dynasty and King William I, the Conqueror, via her father's line.

Military commands

Catherine, as Commander in Chief of the Kohlandian Military, is the commander of the Army, Navy, Air Force and, upon its full establishment, the Space Force. She therefore holds the following ranks:

References

  1. 2015 Bolton Metropolitan Borough Council election, Westhoughton North and Chew Moor ward (accessed 02 October 2019)
  2. The Daily Micronationalist, Catherine's Chats, Episode 0 (accessed 03 October 2019)
  3. The News Review, Episode 1: Brexit, Prorogation and the New Rump Parliament (accessed 02 October 2019)
  4. The Zog, Episode 234: My First Film