Lord of Muschamp Alley

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Lord of Muschamp Alley
Bradley, King of the Romans

since 24 March 2024
AppointerAustenasian Monarch
Inaugural holderSir Gregory Allen, KOM
FormationApril 2006

The Lord of Muschamp Alley is a title within the Empire of Austenasia which since March 2016 has functioned as a sinecure, enabling its holder to be eligible for appointment as a sixth Counsellor of State.


The title of Lord of Muschamp Alley was originally created in 2006 by the Midget Master to denote the responsibility of preventing the pupils of Muschamp Primary School in Carshalton from obstructing an alleyway that runs near their school and so ensuring that pupils of Rushy Meadow Primary (school of the Midget Empire) could travel through it.

In April 2006, a war broke out between the Midget Army and some Muschampers over whether or not pupils of Rushy Meadow should be permitted to travel through Muschamp Alley on their way home from school as a shortcut. A Midget military victory resulted in the Muschampers surrendering and acknowledging a right of free passage for Rushy Meadow pupils through Muschamp Alley. Midget Master Jonathan granted Commander Gregory the title Lord of Muschamp Alley, and charged him with monitoring the Muschampers to ensure that the alleyway remained unobstructed. However, this duty was only performed for about three months until 25 July 2006, when the Midget Master, Gregory, and most of the Midget Army left primary school, and so the title quickly became a mere honorific.

Commander Gregory (knighted into the Order of the Bullmastiff in 2009) retained the title until 3 January 2011, when the Fifth Midget Master granted it as an honorific to Jonathan, then Crown Prince of Austenasia. The day afterwards, an Act of Parliament was passed uniting the title with the position of Austenasian Heir to the Throne, meaning that it passed to Jonathan's sister Crown Princess Caroline when he became Emperor in January 2013.

On 17 March 2016, Emperor Jonathan I passed an Imperial Decree directing Parliament upon approving said decree to legislate for the holder of the position to be eligible for appointment as a sixth Counsellor of State, and decreeing that the office would no longer be held ex officio by the Heir to the Throne. The decree also changed the official function of the office, removing all duties from it except the responsibility to keep the Monarch informed of any future threats or events concerning Muschamp Alley which they may have been ordered to monitor, a duty which is unlikely to ever be necessary to perform. Parliament formally approved this decree on 4 June 2016, in an addendum to the Foreign Affairs Act 2016.

List of Lords of Muschamp Alley

Name Lord from Lord to Notes
Sir Gregory Allen, KOM April 2006 3 January 2011 First holder of the office; initially led near-daily term-time patrols down the alleyway to prevent further obstruction by the Muschampers. Office held nominally after 25 July 2006, with Gregory having left the school.
HIH Crown Prince Jonathan 3 January 2011 20 January 2013 United with the position of Heir to the Austenasian Throne on 4 January 2011. Performed a ceremonial patrol of the alleyway once a month.
HIH Crown Princess Caroline 20 January 2013 25 June 2016 Title held nominally until 17 March 2016, when its original duties were removed and the title was no longer united with the position of Heir to the Throne. On 4 June, the holder of the office became eligible to be appointed a sixth Counsellor of State, but this had no effect on the Crown Princess, with the Heir to the Throne already eligible - if of age - to be appointed as such.
HM King Adam I 25 June 2016 27 February 2022 First holder of the title appointed as such by Emperor Jonathan I in order to be made eligible for future appointment as a Counsellor of State. Appointed as such from 31 August to 31 December 2016, and again between 3 and 9 September 2017.
Lord Michael Simpson, Count of Occibrazos 27 February 2022 24 March 2024 Appointed Lord of Muschamp Alley in order to be made eligible for immediate appointment as a Counsellor of State upon Jonathan I contracting COVID-19, and served as such until 31 March 2022. Was again appointed as Counsellor of State due to demands on the Emperor's time regarding his marriage to Princess Hannah between 26 October and 12 November later that year.
Bradley, King of the Romans 24 March 2024 Incumbent Appointed Lord of Muschamp Alley in order to be made eligible for appointment as a Counsellor of State if necessary in the future.