People's Democratic Republic of Pugguinia
This article contains profanity or other material which may be considered offensive. |
People's Democratic Republic of Pugguinia | |
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File:Parts of Redmond, Washington; an empty lot in Davis, California, outside of Westminster Abbey in England, an emergency evacuation box in a train station in Ibaraki, Japan. | |
Capital | A bathroom in a school in Redmond, Washington |
Largest city | The bathroom in a library in Redmond |
Official languages | English; but native tongue is Pugguinian (learn it here: https://quizlet.com/506115379/learn-pugguinian-flash-cards/) |
Government | Fascinista |
Population | |
• Census | 182 |
Currency | worth 156 million USD |
Time zone | UTC -8:00 |
The People's Democratic Republic of Pugguinia (or Pugguinia for short) is a micronation founded and lead by Alex Gossard. The name 'Pugguinia' comes from its native animal, the Pugguin. The nation resides in Redmond, Washington. With 182 people, Pugguinia is one of the largest micronations ever. Pugguinia has an organized social economic system, although no one ever works, or knows that they even have a job.
History
- Pugguinia was founded on March 27, 2010. It is classified as a Fascinista government. It was started when Alex Gossard was inspired by a spelling error in a presentation he was doing and rather than say it was a mistake a new animal was born the Pugguin. He later realized that it was his dream to leave the United States and he seceded and formed the Union with the Redmond Library Restroom which still has a sign recognizing this great achievement. He hired Comrade Makoto Emura to be his Chief Hacker whom helped greatly in the creation of Pugguinia. Also several other comrades were hired to help devise and initialize this great nation.
- In October 27, 2010: Pugguinia has initiated the Great Step Forward In Technology. Pugguinia's microwiki page has expanded greatly. Pugguinia is also trying to acquire a super computer to assist in the Final Hack and the Final Solution of the world.
- October 28, 2010: Eric Quach was traded for some North Korean named 'Kim'.
- October 28, 2010: The Pugguinian Census was initiated.
- November 17, 2010: Infidel agents from capitalist nations, penetrate Pugguinia's census database storage center, destroying valuable information. Pugguinia has successfully resolved the problem, and has now grown stronger. As quoted from Gandhi: "If you kill me, will the revolution stop?" Please note, however, that Pugguinia did not get hacked.
- November 18, 2010: Pugguinia's Great
FlopFapLeap Forward Program greatly succeeds, raising the employment rate to about 60% - November 25, 2010: After Dictator Gossard's dislike with the splitting of the micronational community, Pugguinia has waged war against any country who supports having two wiki sites.
- January 12, 2011: Pugguinia has succeeded in getting the bus driver to agree to open two windows, for the Pugguinian religion. This day has been declared 'A date which will live in infamy'.
- January 19, 2011: Pugguinia's page (this page) has "strategically withdrew" from the new microwiki after the so called "administrators" blackmailed Pugguinia with the so called "notification" of deletion. Pugguinia's page now resides here.
- April 5, 2011: Window Liberation "Part 2"
- October 24, 2022: Official Pugguinian language released for all to learn.
The Pugguin
Where the country gets its name from its native animal which is half-pug, half penguin has a very special place in the citizens hearts. However, much to their dear leader's dismay, many people in Pugguinia do not know how to spell its name. A pugguin also has bright purple-pink sclera with bright green irises/pupils, which are highlights to the royalty of pugguins.
Ideology and Government
Pugguinia is a Fascinista government. It is a revised version of fascism, communism, and monarchy. Pugguinians are leftists of the United States, opposing capitalism and propaganda. Pugguinia uses torture for punishment, but never uses the death penalty. Pugguinia has one dictator, named Alex Gossard. Pugguinia has many departments underneath, all lead by a chief.
Religion
Pugguinia enforces a religion, named 'The Church of Pugguinia'. Pugguinians learn the 'correct' way of living life in Pugguinia. Alex Gossard, in the books, is a god and the creator. The Church of Pugguinia is a revised combination of The Ramayan, The Bible, The Koran, and The Torah. As Gandhi said "I am a Muslim and a Hindu and a Christan and a Jew!"
The following is from the beginning of book 1.
At first there was nothing.
Then Alex Gossard said: "Let there be light"
And there was light.
Then Alex said: "Let there be pugguins"
Suddenly, many pugguins appeared, and started making a prosperous country.
Pugguinia believes that if the air in vehicles do not have open access to outside, it will blow up like a 'twinkie'. The religion believes in the 'humane' rights of windows. Pugguinia stands up against anyone who 'force' windows to go up. In January 12, 2011, Pugguinia succeeded in getting the bus driver to allow opening the window, even though there was snow outside. It has been determined that the bus driver gave the 'rights' because everyone in the bus was rioting as if they were about to shit and burn.
Propaganda
The world is filled with propaganda. Both good and bad propaganda. Bad propaganda is stuff like Windows Vista, and 'Read My Lips: No New Taxes'. Good propaganda is the pharase "You capitalist pig!", the film 'Triumph of the Will', and the book 'Quotations of Mao Zedong'. In Pugguinia, good propaganda is named 'Propagandee' (an extra 'e' at the end). Pugguinia uses extensive propagandee, ranging from The Finger to Powerpoints to 9 hour long government sponsored films (in production).
Citizens
Pugguinia has a successful population. The current count is 182. Pugguinians greet by saying "Salutations," or "Æaxxo," or "Heil," or "Heil Mein Fuhrer." Becoming a citizen is very easy. It can be requested, but is frequently forced by the Dictator. Each one becomes a citizen after reciting a short blurb, while raising their right hand, administered by the Dictator. When one does not comply to say the oath, only a hand shake is required.
Inauguration Oath
I do solemnly swear,
to uphold the liberties of injustice and tyranny
for as long as I may live or until you (Alex Gossard) say I die.
So help me Pugguin.
(Congratulations, you are our nth citizen.)
*Shakes hands*
Jobs
Pugguinia has a hard time assigning jobs, because of the huge (micro)population. Inspired by the National Socialist German Workers' Party, Pugguinia keeps a census listing everyone in the nation, their race, and their job.
The People's Armed Forces
Pugguinia has a huge show of force.
Small Arms
- Fists
- Golden Ak-47s (in development)
- Dragunov SVDs (in development)
- No scope - hip fire, 360 off of a cliff, for Pugguanian pride.
Explosives
- Paper frag grenades
- Tissue Paper soaked in hand sanitizer
Vehicles
- A non-existent Tiger 1 Tank
- Buses (in development)
- Has only a frame of wire: Efficient resources to people ratio, Bad passengers to death ratio.
Unconventional weapons
- Hand sanitizer
- Bonus: Blueberry hand sanitizer
- Vadim Valanske - Weapon of Mass Destruction (Yes, this is a human bomb)
Uniforms
Pugguinia has a strict uniform policy as they are required to wear the Snozu jacket and khaki pants almost every day. Except on the 4th and 5th Friday and any short week, when they must wear the alternate throwback uniforms. Which were the original uniforms. Also on Mourning Holidays Day (August 30), they are required to wear black slacks as opposed to the khakis.
National Anthem
Pugguinia's national anthem is "Sexual Harassment." It has a jazz type of feel and beat.
When you feel so violated:
Sexual Harassment.
I just want to touch you.
It's nothing personal (continued...)
National Sports
Pugguinia believes that sports are nourishing for the body and soul. It brings Pugguinians to the fields for rest and makes relationships with one other. Pugguinia competes internationally to shake hands and make international ties. Pugguinia currently has 2 sports: Football and Baseball. Pugguinia is thinking of starting winter games also.
Winter Olympics
In fact, Pugguinia will host the next Micronational Winter Sports. It will take place in one of Pugguinia's territories, the bathroom of a library in Redmond. The ground of the bathroom will be flooded, then frozen, creating ice for the games. It will also host marathons, where you run hundreds of times around a 0.5 meter radius circle. (32 times for 100 meter, 128 times for 400 meter, and 1019 times for 2 miles.)
Capital Punishment
Pugguinia sends criminal or rogue pugguinians to Re-education Though Labor camps. It was inspired by the Chinese way of handling shit. Not much is known about what goes on in there, because the camps are in classified sites named black sites, but it is certain that some so-called human rights are being taken. However, it effectively and timely restores Pugguinians to normal, and creates useful resources for the People.
Pugguinia has made radical advances in the field of execution hardware, such as the Wheel. The condemned are staked onto a wagon wheel, then put on a pole. They are spun rapidly. People with hammers strike the spinning Pugguinian, breaking his limbs. Eventually, he dies. The gas chamber is also used. The condemned are put into a desk full of hand sanitizer, effectively (though not quietly) doing its job. Pugguinia fortunately never used the death penalty.
Diplomatic Relations
- Pugguinia is known to not make many friends in the micronational community for it's stance on many wars and policies but does have an Informal Peace Treaty with the Slinky Empyre.
- Pugguinia also has 2 commonwealth nations. It is Conadia and Kerflufia. For simplicity, those nations are known as micro-micro nations.
Wars
Pugguinia has engaged itself in many wars including its war with Canada and Israel, but both these wars ended with peaceful draws. But more recently Pugguinia has waged war against any country that supports have two microwikis. Pugguinia also participated in the Atlantis Civil War. Pugguinia has never technically lost a war.
Below is a list of countries that Pugguinia is currently at war with:
Controversies
Pugguinia has had many controversies many of which began before it was founded. As a result, Pugguinia has been condemned by some.
- On June 17 of 2009 The leader of Pugguinia was believed to be, but never charged with, aiding the hacking of a school computer by Makoto Emura. When it was announced that Makoto would become Chief Hacker it started heavy controversy. But as the leader has stated, "we hired him to hack not for anything else."
- Pugguinia uses corruption such as forcing people to become comrades and using extensive Propagandee.