Joshua L. Schnurman Foundation Bridge
 | This page contains material that is kept because it is considered humourous. It is not meant to be taken seriously. |
 The JLSF Bridge After its collapse. | |
| Built | January 2022 |
|---|---|
| Collapsed | 25 January 2022 |
| Material |
|
| Length | 10 inches |
| Location | Townsville terriotry, Excelsior |
| Architect | Joshua Schnurman |
| Type | Suspension |
The Joshua L. Schnurnman Foundation Bridge was a suspension bridge designed by Joshua Schnurman in the Townsville Territory of the Excelsior Republic. Built out of playing cards, twine, and a "Scandalous" amount of tape, construction was finished on January 23, 2022 to great fanfare. The bridge served the Townsville Territory of Excelsior, and was the largest bridge ever built in Excelsior, surpassing the previous S.I.D. Bridge. Many commented that the bridge looked "contorted" and "unusable" when construction was finished, but the bridge was still opened on January 24. The bridge collapsed on January 25th. There were no fatalities.
Construction
The bridge was commissioned on 15 January 2022, for a bridge-building school assignment. Construction began steadily on 16 January, with the road deck and towers being completed shortly after. The bridge was finished on the 23rd of January, behind schedule. The state of the finished bridge was described as "contorted" and "unusable", as the road deck twisted and banked to the side if a load was placed on it.
Service
The bridge entered service on the 24 January 2022 to great fanfare. The Excelsioran government claimed the bridge as part of the Townsville Territory, making it the longest Excelsioran bridge in history. The intended usage of the bridge, being only 10 inches long, was to transport "Bugs and ants", according to its architect, Joshua Schnurman, from one side of a ledge to another. On its first day of service, it received no bugs.
Collapse
In the afternoon of 25 January 2022, the second day the bridge was in service, the road deck became twisted at a dangerous angle to the left. After the main beam began separating from the anchor, the bridge was immediately closed. After testing pressure was applied, the left tower began to tilt to the right. At 11:48 a.m., the road deck began to buckle and became dangerously low. Any efforts to save the bridge were abandoned, and at 11:49 a.m., the road deck buckled and collapsed, with the left tower falling on top to the right. There were no fatalities or injuries.
Aftermath
After the bridge collapsed, it was fully demolished and taken apart for scrap. The lower left tower was salvaged and now sits in the Bundesmuseum in Grandsia. An investigation revealed that there were serious deficiencies in the construction of the bridge, and that it was in fact unusable. On the day of the collapse the load on the bridge exceeded the load it was created to carry, setting of a process ending in its collapse. There are no current plans to replace the bridge.