Japittyist Municipal People's Calendar of Badu Park

The Japittyist Municipal People's Calendar of Badu Park is the official calendar of Badu Park. One year is called a "Japitty Solar Revolution Authorised By Japitty Cumquat of Badu Park, and the Badu Park Calendar Authority of Municipal Time Calculation" and is often shortened to ""Japitty Solar Revolution", a "Japitt" or a "Baseball" (used only by Badu Park Fraternity of Religion to "avoid confusion" and promote calendar adoption among members. It is known for its extremely inefficient format and ridiculous names. It is also known for its lack of consistency, as multiple formats have stemmed from the base form, due to religious interpretations and secular usage. In this calendar, there has not been one Japitty Solar Revolution, and the official Japitt is 0. A reference date is 19 September 2020, which, in the calendar, would be Japitty, 1st of Japitty1, Japitt 0. Deconstructed as Japitty (first day of the week), 1st of Japitty1 (day of the month, and month name), Japitt 0 (year number).

Years

A Japitt (year) is divided into 23 months

No.	Name	Length in days
1	Japitty1	31
2	Japitty Two	28
3	Japitty4	31
4	Japitty the third	30
5	Thrice Japitt	31
6	June	122
7	Mike	12 (44 on leap year)
8	August	31
9	Month	30
10	Florida	31
11	No Nut	30
12	December	1
13	Japitty	24
14	Japitty (called "Lower Japitty" to avoid confusion)	3 (Festevalo Number Blue begins 1.5 days into Lower Japitty, and continues into Nuttingham)
15	Nuttingham	582+1 (Five Hundred and Eighty Twelve subtracts 1 day from the calnedar, putting an extra day on nuttingham, which has been deeply criticised by Japitty for "being exceptionally stupid, yet efficient".)
16	Five Hundred and Eighty Twelve	-1 (subtracts one day from the calendar, adding an extra day to Nuttingham)
17	A.	0.5 (Half of one day, known as "International Thursday")
18	Alphabet 12	0.5 (Half of one day, known as "International Thursday")
19	Badu Park	365
20	Acorn Tree	13 (considered an unlucky month by Japittyists)
21	Tuesday	1
22	Year	365 (subtract one on a leap year)
23	Japitty 2018	0.25 (3 days when Japitty feels like it)

Weeks

A week is divided into 12.5 days known as a "Japitty" or a "mas"

No.	Name
1	Japitty (known as "First Japitty" to avoid confusion)
2	Japitty (rejected by Badu Park Fraternity of Religion, and if International Thursday falls on this day, it is removed from the calendar for that Japitt (year), because Japitty says "It is inefficient to count days like that." Often the day is called "rejectmas")
3	Japitty (known as "Japitty before Monday" to avoid confusion)
4	Monday
5	Japitty (known as "Japitty Two Days Before Yogulmas" and occasionally "Japitty before Japittymas and after Monday" to avoid confusion)
6	Japittymas
7	Yogulmas
8	Masmas
9	Cumblemas
10	Saturmas (often skipped by all because it's "too similar to Wednesday")
11	Ceiling_fan_mounted_on_a_pine_conemas(12) (This day is often utilised to make home repairs, as symbolised by the number 12 being affixed to the end)
12	Electionsarenotriggedmas
12.5	Fuckmas (rejected by the Badu Park Fraternity of Religion, causing secular tension and interpretation issues)

Various religious interpretations and forms of the calendar

The standard variation of the calendar is known as the (Classical trendy format) and is used by all except the Badu Park Fraternity of Religion and the Order of the Number Blue, who utilise the "Rejected Form" and the "Number Blue Edition" respectively. Traditional format was used by the Orthodox Rite for 2 days before the calendar was modified to be "more correct", which used to add 28 days to Tuesday and rejected Yogulmas. Some "Municipal time format purists" continue to use a modified version of this format, accepting the current amount of days in Tuesday, but still rejecting Yogulmas.

Rejected Form

Rejected Form rejects Fuckmas, Rejectmas, and International Thursday, as well as rejecting the months of Nuttingham and August, subtracting 1 day from December and adds 582 days to Tuesday to make for the lost days in Nuttingham, which is believed to be illegitimate. The rejections are made by the Badu Park Fraternity of Religion as they believe the Orthodox Rite forced these stipulations into existance under order of George Lachman, and is thus illegitimate.

Number Blue Edition

Number Blue Edition is used by the Order of the Number Blue to conform with their strict pilgrimage regimen. It extends Nuttingham by a further 362 days, and reduce Masmas by 58 minutes to be "more fulfilling to their religious goals and ideals". To make up for lost time, they extend Yogulmas by 50 minutes and Ceiling_fan_mounted_on_a_pine_conemas(12) by 8 minutes. Yogulmas is modified to be a holy day for the Order of the Number Blue, which requires members to plant a bowl of cereal in a strangers backyard, often involving trespassing and elaborate planning to break in to backyards. The cereal cannot be cocopops, and is preferably honey nut cheerios. Fruit loops are frowned upon, but still allowed.

Traditional Format

Used by the Orthodox Rite for 2 days, traditional format was the original calendar before it was modified to the standard variation to be "more correct". Traditional format originally had 28 days in Tuesday and did not feature Yogulmas. Some "Municipal time format purists" continue to use a modified version of this format, accepting the current amount of days in Tuesday, but still rejecting Yogulmas, disconnecting the religious connotation with the calendar, using it instead as a cultural and political calendar.

Special Standard Format

The Special Standard form is used by George Lachman and the Presidential Guard, which is the Gregorian calendar, but with an extra day in September called " Subsequent Yogulmas" to not attract suspicion by Japitty.

Theme Song

The calendar features a theme song played whenever a new day starts, called "Yogulmas unites us all". It is the national anthem repurposed with lyrics by Dick Smith, which are the words "Yogulmas is cool!" at 33 seconds in.

Criticism

Criticism of the Japittyist Calendar is widespread, with the majority of citizens asking authorities to ban the calendar and arrest the creators. The majority of the criticism comes from Japitty Cumquat, who claims "While efficient, the calendar is dumb, stupid, and inefficient" and "The Calendar is misinterpreted by religious fanatics who claim to know special knowledge about me and my calendar, when in fact they disgrace the most efficiently inefficient calendar in the world, and thus, I hate the calendar, as it is grossly misrepresented and quite frankly shat on, and thus I use the Special Standard Format to avoid confusion, and also to avoid association with these losers." He has not spoken on the issue since.

Rival Calendars

Cheezit McDaniels has released his own calendar, called the "Imperial First of September People's Royal Democratic Dictatorship Calendar" and has 2 days. It is not used by anyone besides Cheezit McDaniels. Japitty Cumquat used it for 2 days stating "I think this might catch on, very inovative and efficient." Later adding "Potatofest is my favourite day!" He was removed from the 7/11 which he made this press conference in.

Structure of the Imperial First of September People's Royal Democratic Dictatorship Calendar

A year is divided into 1 months

No.	Name	Length
1	Dickmas Duck	2 days

Days in the monthth

No.	Name
1	Cheezit McDaniels' Imperial Day of the Laptop
2	Potatofest