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User:Z. Luna Skye
| This user will be less active because of
|This page is really weird. I warned you.|
I went on MicroWiki once for fun – and now I have a huge friendship, positive community, highly developed and active micronation, and I know how to use proper spelling and grammar.
Short bio: Glorified maintenance guy obsessed with MicroWiki who gets pinged a lot, has difficulty in pronouncing the letter 'R', who is an Asexual furry and is allergic to alcohol. I'm also a statistician, amateur filmmaker, actor and film critic.
Hewwo! I am a self-proclaimed proficient editor of MicroWiki, I take care of most of the maintenance work. I am also MicroWiki's #1 fan! Check out my funny second account Z. Luna Skye 2, and my bot ZedBot. Also check out my dumb editors survey. I am a WikiGnome, meaning I mostly make minor edits, such as improving punctuation, fixing typos, correcting poor grammar, creating redirects and wanted categories, adding categories, and repairing broken links. I also never provide an edit summary, and annoy the other admins. UwU
𒀱 Please don't email me at Z_luna_skye@catlover.com 𒀱
Talk page archives
My social medias
- 1 Userboxes
- 2 A chronology...
- 3 My travels
- 4 Edit stuff
- 4.1 My edit setup
- 4.2 Edits for ta lolz
- 4.3 Articles to create
- 4.4 Daily tasks list...
- 4.5 Random MicroWiki article archives I made
- 4.6 New Eiffel article classes
- 5 Hobbies
- 6 Favourite quotes
- 7 Milestones
- 8 Wikis I am registered on
- 9 Contact
- 10 Random
- 11 Statuses
- 12 My LGBT rights Index
- 13 Other Projects I am prOud oFF
- 14 Cute emotes
- 15 Movie Scripts
- 16 Bibliography
- 17 See also
- 18 Footnotes
- 19 References
- 20 External links
- 21 Further reading
- 22 Ancestry
- 23 Issues
- 24 Other
- 25 Archive links
- 27 September 2018: I joined MicroWiki.
- 28 September 2018: I made my first edit and created the page Principality of New Eiffel.
- 25 November 2018: I uploaded my first file.
- 26 November 2018: I made my 100th edit.
- 13 December 2018: I joined the MicroWiki Forums.
- 9 January 2019: I made my 1,000th edit.
- 7 February 2019: I joined MicroWiki@Discord.
- 24 February 2019: I was made a Patroller! :3
- 14 March 2019: I uploaded my 100th file.
- 18 March 2019: I made my 5,000th edit.
- 18 March 2019: I made 318 edits in 1 day.
- 7 April 2019: I with help from Luxor created MicroWikiDictionary.
- 19 April 2019: @New Eiffel Government became a thing.
- 2 June 2019: I joined Czech MicroWiki.
- 7 June 2019: I made my 10,000th edit.
- 21 June 2019: I uploaded my 200th file.
- 3 July 2019: My idea for a featured image on the main page was implemented.
- 29 July 2019: I uploaded my 300th file.
- 18 August 2019: I joined the cool kids Micropolitan Club and Lounge.
- 23 August 2019: I made my 15,000th edit.
- 27 September 2019: I celebrated my 1 Year Microversary!
- 5 October 2019: The Principality of New Eiffel got Good Article status!
- 10 October 2019: I made 507 edits in 1 day.
- 29 October 2019: I uploaded my 400th file.
- 7 November 2019: I officially got the most edits on MicroWiki! (18,607 edits)
- 7 November 2019: I made 728 edits in 1 day.
- 5 December 2019: I made my 20,000th edit!
- 1 January 2020: I made the first edit of 2020! Woohoo!
- 2 February 2020: I was made a wiki admin! :D
- 26 February 2020: I uploaded my 500th file! (File:Új Repülő Street.png)
NOTE: This only includes places that I am visiting for the first time. (Some may be incorrect)
- Netherlands (2018, 2019)
- Spain (2012, 2015)
- 2004 United Kingdom (Live here)
- 2005 South Africa (2005, 2016, 2017, 2018)
- 2008/2009? France (2008/2009?, 2018, 2019)
- 2009 Austria (2009, 2019)
- 2012 Germany
- 2012 Czech Republic
- 2019 Switzerland
- 2019 Liechtenstein
- 2012 Canary Islands (Spain)
- 2015 Gibraltar (British Overseas Territory)
- 2019 Scotland (United Kingdom)
- Unknown Kimberley
- Unknown St Albans
- Unknown Sutton
- Unknown Manchester
- 2007/2008? Paris
- 2012 Prague
- 2012 Canary Islands
- 14 Sep 2014 Surrey
- 22 Dec 2014 City of Westminster
- 1 Jan 2015 Granada
- Jan 2015 Gibraltar
- 20 March 2015 Weybridge
- 28 June 2015 Twickenham
- 26 March 2016 Warwickshire
- ?? Oct 2016 Johannesburg
- ?? Oct 2016 Cape Town
- 19 Oct 2016 Kruger National Park
- 23 Jan 2017 Roehampton
- 20 May 2017 Hampshire
- 21 May 2017 London Borough of Havering
- 23 July 2017 Norwich
- 23 July 2017 Sutton
- 23 July 2017 Norfolk
- 13 Aug 2017 Somerset
- 13 Aug 2017 Cornwall
- 13 Aug 2017 Redruth
- 14 Aug 2017 Port Isaac
- 9 Dec 2017 Pretoria
- 28 Dec 2017 Rustenburg
- 16 Feb 2018 Caterham
- 30 March 2018 Staffordshire
- 10 Sep 2018 South Gloucestershire
- 12 Sep 2018 Lancashire
- 12 Sep 2018 Blackpool
- 24 Dec 2018 Kent
- 24 Dec 2018 Coquelles
- 24 Dec 2018 Pas-de-Calais
- 24 Dec 2018 Nord
- 24 Dec 2018 Kortrijk
- 24 Dec 2018 Ghent
- 24 Dec 2018 Antwerp
- 24 Dec 2018 Amstelveen
- 30 Dec 2018 Amsterdam
- 14 March 2019 Green Gate
- 19 April 2019 Isle of Sheppy
- 25 May 2019 Epping Forest District
- 25 May 2019 City of Chelmsford
- 22 June 2019 Essex
- 19 July 2019 City of London
- 4 August 2019 Salisbury
- 11 August 2019 New Leeds
- 11 August 2019 Plitvice
- 11 August 2019 Új Repülő
- 17 August 2019 Berkshire
- 8 September 2019 Wiltshire
- 8 September 2019 Bath
- 14 September 2019 Buckinghamshire
- 14 September 2019 Cheshire
- 14 September 2019 Liverpool
- 14 September 2019 Metropolitan Borough of Wigan
- 14 September 2019 Warrington
- 14 September 2019 Scotland →
- 14 September 2019 Glasgow →
- 15 September 2019 Aberdeen →
- 15 September 2019 Inverness →
- 15 September 2019 Peterhead →
- 16 September 2019 Edinburgh →
- 16 September 2019 Perth →
- 5 October 2019 Dunsfold Aerodrome (Top Gear test track) →
- 26 October 2019 Aisne →
- 26 October 2019 Laon →
- 26 October 2019 Marne →
- 26 October 2019 Reims →
- 27 October 2019 Vitry-le-François →
- 27 October 2019 Saint-Dizier →
- 27 October 2019 Commercy →
- 27 October 2019 Meurthe-et-Moselle →
- 27 October 2019 Nancy →
- 27 October 2019 Colmar →
- 27 October 2019 Mulhouse →
- 27 October 2019 Basel →
- 27 October 2019 Frick →
- 27 October 2019 Canton of Zürich →
- 29 October 2019 Lucerne →
- 29 October 2019 Canton of St. Gallen →
- 29 October 2019 Vaduz →
- 29 October 2019 Schaan →
- 29 October 2019 Feldkirch →
- 16 November 2019 Guildford →
- 23 November 2019 Hertfordshire →
- 23 November 2019 London Borough of Enfield →
- 23 November 2019 Enfield Town →
Soon going too...
Planning and not yet confirmed
- United States of America, Walt Disney World... August/September 2020
- South Africa... May 2021
- Italy... Unknown
Top places I want to visit
NOTE: Not in any particular order
- Jacob's Ladder (Saint Helena)
- United Kingdom, Embassy of North Korea, London
- Isle of Skye
- United States, Idaho, Sawtooth Range
- Canada, Jasper National Park
- Finland, Helsinki
Places I've visited
|Countries I've lived in or traveled to:|
|Micronations I've lived in/traveled to:|
|Defunct micronations I've lived in/traveled to:|
|Cities I have lived in or traveled to:|
Switzerland, very beautiful pic!
Me in the Netherlands!
Me in Scotland!
Me in South Africa!
Me in Liechtenstein!
Me in Essex!
My edit setup
What I use while editing MicroWiki. And yes, it's just two iPads. Anyways, at the top left is notifications/alerts, and at the right is special:recent changes. At the bottom is the main editing space, and where I watch a movie in split screen.
Edits for ta lolz
Outdated. Note: Sandbox edits and page moves don’t count as edits in namespace.
|Total||13,376 (all 14,008)||100%|
Articles to create
- 2019 in New Eiffel
- 2018 in New Eiffel
- New Eiffel-United Kingdom North Border
- Minister of Education (New Eiffel)
- Conservative Party (New Eiffel)
- Tomáš Falešník
- Zínt Fashion
- James Reginald Frisch
- Borders of New Eiffel
- Vandalism in New Eiffel
- Flag of New Eiffel
- New Leeds
- ! (DJ Zeddy album)
- The best soup Opera ever made
- (Blank) Commercial!
- New Eiffel Gardens
- Timeline of New Eiffelic history
- AA (Any age)
- Celebrations Day
- The Garden Slows Before the Snows ❌
- Transportation in New Eiffel ✔️
- New Eiffel-United Kingdom South Border ✔️ (Redirect)
- Explanation mark ✔️ (Redirect)
- New Leeds Alley ✔️ (Stub)
- Christian Conservative Party ✔️ (Stub)
- A Prince getting sidetracked a lot ✔️ (Redirect)
- DIME (company) ✔️
- J16 ✔️
- Soothing Ring of Fire ✔️
- Seat Street ✔️ (Stub)
- !khās Street ✔️ (Stub)
- South Alley ✔️
- Walkway Alley ✔️
- Új Repülő ✔️
- Coat of Arms of New Eiffel ✔️
Daily tasks list...
- Welcome new users[note 1]
- Clean up articles marked for deletion
- Patrol Special:Recent Changes
- Create articles in User:Z. Luna Skye/Articles for creation
Random MicroWiki article archives I made
All archives of this list are available on the Wayback Machine
Statistical list archives
MicroWiki main page
New Eiffel article classes
|This article contains out-of-date information or information about an entity that is currently undergoing major changes.|
- 2019 Micronational Rock Paper Scissors Tournament
- Arstotzka Observation
- Coat of Arms of New Eiffel (2018)
- Airforce of New Eiffel
- Cat's Day
- Classical Claw Films
- Dog's Day
- Flag of New Eiffel
- Ministry of Transportation (New Eiffel)
- 2018 New Eiffel Prime Minister Election
- 2019 film in New Eiffel
- 2019 New Eiffel Prime Minister Election
- 2019 New Eiffelic National Film Festival
- Coat of Arms of New Finland (31 December 2017)
- Construction and infrastructure in New Eiffel
- Democratic Territory of Hsed
- Embassy of Plushunia, New Eiffel
- List of Acts of the Parliament of New Eiffel
- List of books originating from New Eiffel
- List of coats of arms used in New Eiffel
- List of companies in New Eiffel
- List of short films released in New Eiffel
- List of locations in New Eiffel
- List of New Eiffelic Awards
- List of protests in New Eiffel
- List of renamed cities in New Eiffel
- List of roads in New Eiffel
- List of television shows originating from New Eiffel
- List of wars and conflicts New Eiffel has been in
I have a few hobbies (yes, I have a life off of MicroWiki!):
I like movies, what can I say? I have seen over 1,200 of them. Road to 10,000! Although, I am not officially counting every single one.
Movies seen by year
|2017||=108 (since 19 September)||YouTube, Dailymotion, Apple TV|
|2018||542 (since 14 February)||Prime Video, Terrarium TV, YouTube|
|2019||314||Netflix, Prime Video|
|2020||19 so far||Netflix|
I am currently (kinda slacking off a bit) working on two feature films, The Republic of Me and a documentary about New Eiffel. I am the founder of the New Eiffelic film studio Z&jProductions, where me and my bro have made over 20 short-films.
I am an actorrrrr. I notably starred in the film First Bite, which was released on YouTube on 9 May 2018. On September 2018, I auditioned for a role in a comedy school-themed short film. On 22 September, I went to a second audition for the film, however did not get the role. On 2 July 2019, I acted in the film InterYet To Come, which came second place in the 2019 Childnet Film Competition.
|2018||First Bite||First victim|
|2019||InterYet to Come||Ghost of Internet Past|
|This user page is in the middle of an expansion or major restructuring. You are welcome to assist in its construction by editing it as well. If this article has not been edited in several days, please remove this template.|
I am a film critic and owner of ZSR Film Reviews, where I publish random reviews for various feature films. A rate films on a score of 0.0 - 10.
Wikis and encyclopaedias
If life has no point, sharpen it.
To the world you may just be one person, but to one person you may be the world.— Brandi Snyder
After a while, you learn to ignore the names people call you and just trust who you are.— Shrek
No one is useless in this world who lightens the burdens of another.
There can’t be a rainbow if it doesn’t rain.
What, are you doing in my swamp?!— Shrek
Potatoes are like friends; if you eat them, they will die.
When I say i'm Bi, I don't mean Bisexual. I mean Bi-myself.— Kaidon Melon
I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways the won’t work.
It’s Not The Gift. It’s The Thought That Counts.
No one has ever changed the world by doing what the world has told them to do.— Eddy Zhong
Often I am upset that I cannot fall in love, but I guess this avoids the stress of falling out of it.— Cavetown
Nothing Is Permanent In This Wicked World - Not Even Our Troubles.
Quality Over Quantity.
Humans Are Like Cooked Potatoes, They Are Covered In Skin, But Soft On The Inside... Sometimes.— Prince Zarel I
A Little kindness can go a long way
Nostalgia used to be a treat, now it's a burden.
After 5,000 edits
- 20,000 Edits : 5 December 2019 at 11:35 pm
- 15,000 Edits : 23 August 2019 at 2:59 am
- 10,000 Edits : 7 June 2019
- 9,000 Edits : 23 May 2019
- 8,000 Edits : 7 May 2019
- 7,000 Edits : 18 April 2019
- 6,000 Edits : 4 April 2019
- 5,000 Edits : 18 March 2019
Before 4,500 edits
- 4,500 Edits : 14 March 2019
- 4,000 Edits : 2 March 2019
- 3,000 Edits : 18 February 2019
- 2,000 Edits : 30 January 2019
- 1,500 Edits : 20 January 2019
- 1,000 Edits : 9 January 2019
- 500 Edits : 21 December 2018
- 250 Edits : 12 December 2018
- 100 Edits : 26 November 2018
- 10 Edits : 13 October 2018
- 1 Edit : 28 September 2018 at 9:48 AM
- 400 uploads : 29 October 2019
- 300 uploads : 29 July 2019
- 200 uploads : 21 June 2019
- 100 uploads : 14 March 2019
- 1 upload : 25 November 2018
Article creation milestones
Good articles milestones
- 2 good articles : 20 November 2019 - New Eiffel Main Route 1
- 1 good article : 5 October 2019 - Principality of New Eiffel
Wikis I am registered on
|Wiki||Joined on||Edit count||Page creations||Groups||Account|
|MicroWiki||27 September 2018||23,519||1,679||Patroller||Z. Luna Skye|
|Wikipedia||15 August 2017||185||3||Anonymous 7481|
|Czech MicroWiki||2 June 2019||2||1||Z. Luna Skye|
|MicroWikiDictionary||7 April 2019||27||7||Z. Luna Skye|
|Royal Wiki||25 July 2019||1||1||Administrators||Z. Luna Skye|
|Awful Movies Wiki||4 April 2019||6||0||Z. Luna Skye|
|Un-Recognized Nations (defunct)||21 June 2019||54||52|
|Uncyclopedia||4 April 2019||5||2||Z. Luna Skye|
|WikiFur||4 April 2019||1||0||Z. Luna Skye|
|WikiHow||15 June 2019||0||0|
|New Eiffel Wiki||21 July 2019||9||3||Z. Luna Skye|
|Conservapedia||11 August 2019||1||1||Leftisstupidimo|
|[Placeholder]||21 November 2019||241
|Proto-Nations Wiki||January 2020||1||1||Z. Luna Skye|
This is slightly outdated
|New Eiffel Government#4073|
English languages dialects as explained by me
- British English
- American English - Misspelled British English
- Australian English - mate
- South African English - British English with Afrikaans words
- Black South African English - South African English but worse
- Canadian English - American English but every ten words is an apology
- Simple English - English but spelled by a dyslexic 9 year old
- User:Z. Luna Skye/ChoiceGameBeta
- User:Z. Luna Skye/Maketheedit!
- User:Z. Luna Skye/Roleplay Games
- User:Z. Luna Skye/Stanley Parable Text Version
Other micronations I own
- Principality of Zëlsa
- USSR (United Shrek Swamp Republic)
- Bowist Shibu
- Kingdom of Tesco
- Kingdom of Bruhpoo
My LGBT rights Index
Take the survey Here
Other Projects I am prOud oFF
MicroWiki users with the most edits
- MicroWiki Records
- Dime Micronationalist of the Month
- Most monthly edits
- User:Z. Luna Skye/micro mentions chart lol
- ( ^ω^ )
- \( 0 ω ^ )/
- ( ・∇・)
- ~(‘ ω *)+
- Howl! ARH-WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
- mew, meow, purr, hiss, snarl, moo, low, boom, squeak, chirp, caw
Alpha and Omega (2010)
It's time to ride the slide and taste the wind. Humphrey, you are totally genius. Come on. Let's do it. Air wolf! Guys. Guys. We're not moving! This caribou is mine. Kate, I'm not a caribou. I'm your sister! Gotcha. Omegas don't play like this. You can't escape the greatest Alpha ever. Well, I just did. We're going to die! Keep it steady! Keep it steady! What was I thinking? That was great! We are flying today, guys. Humphrey? Kate? What are you doing up here? I'm practice-hunting for our lunch. Good, 'cause I'm about to lose mine. You are? I'll try to swallow it. Kate! It's time to go. I'm coming, Dad. Where you going? Spring? But that's a whole winter away. I know you're Kate's friend, Humphrey. But by next spring, she will be a trained Alpha, the future leader of the pack. No doubt you'll be a clever Omega. Learn to keep the peace. And Humphrey, remind us all to have fun. But... But... Alphas and Omegas can't... How do you say it? That's our custom. The law of the pack. Wolf pile! Silly Omegas. Hey. Take a left! Thirty degrees! Salty, give her some sail draft! I think I taste the wind. No, just a bug. Hey, Mooch, get ready! Lower the boom! -All right! -Hang 10, boys! Guys, we really need to work on the brakes! -Brakes? -Brakes? Wolf pile! Get your butt out of my face. What did we hit? Spring. Look who's back from Alpha school. Forget about it, Humphrey. Kate's an Alpha now. And you're an Omega. We're friends, okay? Exactly. Just friends. End of story. You better set your sights over there. Reba and Janice, the vegetarians. Okay. Looks like we're eating caribou tonight, boys. Hey. Hey. Eastern Pack wolves. Can-do, Hutch, we've got company. Great. There goes dinner. And there goes Kate. -Holy... -Caribou! Scatter to the sides! Settle the score, leader. Are you all right? -Yeah, I'm fine. -Hey, what's your problem, you stupid Eastern dog? That was our hunt. You can't just snake it out from under us. Can-do, back off. You better listen to the girl. Hey, break it up. Can-do, Hutch, break it up! All right, Omegas, duty calls. Stop it. Can-do, Hutch, stop! -Hey! -Candy! -Kate. -Humphrey? I'm still going to tear this snaggletooth fool apart. Guys, lower the boom! Humphrey, we don't have time for fun. Guys, guys, come on. Don't get your fur in a bunch. You wolves are making us look bad. Come on, the caribou are laughing at us. Now, that's a moon I don't want to howl to. Western hunt group, get back to the den. The two of you, go home. Now! Omegas, good job. Great. My first hunt, and I blew it. Kate, Kate, Kate, Kate, Kate. Don't beat yourself up. That's crazy. You were amazing. I mean, if anyone's hungry, they can eat... They can always eat... Here. They can eat berries. Berries are really nutritious. Yeah. Tell that to a hungry pack. The Eastern Wolves ruined Kate's hunt. Luckily, the Omegas were there to break up the fight. -Lilly. -What? Very funny. Stop playing with your tail. Kate, you're slouching. Thank you, honey. Do you see how strong and beautiful you are? My. Any food is a blessing, dear. Winston? Come join us for dinner? Now! Thank you, honey. Scraps and bones is no kind of dinner. Not for my pack. I'm sorry, Dad. it's just those Eastern Wolves. It's not your fault, Kate. When they crossed into our territory, they broke pack law. Winston. Can-do was jumped by a group of Eastern Wolves. It ain't nothing. Quickly, bring him into the den. Winston, honey, whoever did this, let's rip his tail off and shove it down his throat. Sir, are we just going to let them keep raiding our hunts and... Put our Alphas on alert. Already done, sir. Good job. Guys, honestly, caribou is overrated. Instead, now, keep an open mind, I just want you to have an open mind here, we bring you berries. How about squirrels? Bad joke. Flying squirrels. Winston! Tony! You're looking good. My back feels like wood. I got this disk that keeps cracking. Yeah, Tony, you are one crazy wolf. -Yeah? -Yeah. Like that little game of tag during our hunt. Let's leave the playing to the Omegas. You know there's no caribou left in the east. You got a problem. Unite the packs, Winston. It was you who gave the big speech that your daughter Kate and my son Garth would marry and unite the packs. Garth knows his responsibility. Does Kate? Don't worry. She knows. Good. Then she can meet Garth tonight at the moonlight howl. I won't let my pack starve, Winston. If we have to, we'll fight for the valley. That would be a big mistake. Kate. it's... It's okay, Dad. I understand. it's... it's my responsibility. Guys, we got to get ready for the moonlight howl. Guys, girls. Girls? You are cool. So, let me go ahead... Prepare the girls for your arrival and you guys meet me there. Game on. Girls. Kate, you look so beautiful. Now, if Garth gets out of line, take those beautiful teeth of yours, go for the throat, and don't let go until the body stops shaking. If my little girl doesn't want to do this, if she's not ready... Don't worry, Dad. I'm ready. Come on, Lilly. Okay. Okay. Your fur... It looks fantastic tonight. Oh, my gosh. I had... Omega alert. I will handle this. It totally relaxes the knots. Hey. Hey. That's all I've got. Wow. This is a new feeling. I saw the whole thing, guys. And, I cannot believe they didn't just fall all over you. When you yelled, "Hey," I thought you cinched it right there. So, you think you can do better? Please. The next girl that comes up the hill, she's mine. I've never seen her look that good. Kate is hot. I'll be right back. Hey. Where do you think you're going? Humphrey, you know the rules. You're not allowed to howl with her. She's an Alpha. We can eat together. Guys, I know. I... I was just... Kidding. Cheer up, buddy. You still got us. Friends for life! Ugly- So, do you see Garth? Great. I'm not even sure what he looks like. But I'm sure... We'll know him when we see him. Hey, Kate. What? Garth. Lilly, stand up. Garth, hello. Good to see you. -Humphrey? -My butt! My butt. It really hurts. You should really do something about that cough. Be careful, Kate. There's something going around. Tails and ears are falling off, literally. Name's Humphrey. Garth. Wow. You are a... You are a big one, aren't you? Wow. You're practically a moose. Where you hiding them antlers? Who's the coyote? Who's the coyote? I get it. That's good, 'cause I'm, like... No one important. Lilly, why don't you take little coyote Humphrey and run along? Come on, Humphrey. Let's go eat some of those bitter berries. So, tell me about yourself. What does Garth like to do? Well, I'm really into fitness, you know? Rabbit sprints, tree squats. You know us Alphas got to keep fit to lead the pack. But, what really gets me going is... Was it good for you? Unbelievable. You know... I just... Just... Hold on a sec 'cause I'm going to be right back. I... I need some water. Some water. Okay? So, I'll... Just... Hold on. No worries. I'll just keep my vocal chords warm. Yeah. "Oh, he's no one important. "Just take little coyote Humphrey and run along." Coyote. -Where's Barf? -it's Garth. And we're just taking a little break. A break? What? Is that so strange? No. No, no, no, no. Are you kidding? I always like to take a break Well, I do. Your howling partner, he's not a... He's not a stud. Not a stud but, like, it's like "stud" but... A dud. A dud. That's it. isn't he? No. He is not a dud. In fact, Humphrey, you'd be surprised to find that he is... Strong! Yes. Yes! Strong! And he's... He's... -Proud! -Yes! Yes. Proud. And he's... What's the word I'm looking for? An Alpha's Alpha. That is right! He is an Alpha's Alpha. You make me so mad! Hey, I was just kidding. You're kind of cute. Really? You think... So, wow. Okay. Cute. Yeah. That's... Look... Thank you, first of all, but do you mean "Cute" in, like, a rugged, kind of handsomely "Cute"? Again with the butt. These mosquitoes are out of control. I'll meet you on Mars, right after I eat the Milky Way. That sounds good. Save some for me. Bag them up, boys. We're going to Idaho. You got it, chief. Okay. There we go. Watch out there. Kate? Where am I? Humphrey? Is that you? Kate! Where are we? I don't know. Maybe we're dead. Nope. Definitely not dead. At least they left us some water. You got water? Nope. Definitely not water. Kate, what are you doing? Trying to get out. Calm down. Listen, maybe they're taking us to where there's more food. Or maybe we are the food. Kate, you're right. Fight. Fight. Fight. Fight. Yeah. All right. Set them free. Look at them go. Wow. This isn't Jasper. Yeah, but it sure does... Rock! Quick, get down! What are they doing? What a smashingly brilliant story this is. The golfing goose from the low regions of the Arctic Circle is leading the pack. He's using the wrong club. Could you do me a favor, Needles, and shut the hole that makes the words? Looks like they're playing some sort of weird game. Maybe they can tell us how to get home. Yeah. And if they can't, we can eat them. Yeah. Follow my lead. Yeah, I'm right behind you. Now you will see, this shot is mine. Splendid! Wonderful hit, sir. Just a minute! It's ugly, but a good runner. Did you see that? Did you see that? I guess the birdie ruined your Birdie. You mark it "Birdie" because it would have gone in. Technically, sir, it might have gone in. That silly bird stopped my shot from going in. So, I will not take an extra stroke. Mark it Birdie! Well, it... It was an obstacle. And everyone has to play with the obstacles. You know, we wouldn't want to lie. This is not a lie. This is not a lie if you are French. Well, French-Canadian. There's a slash, a hyphen, in between there. -I say French. -Canadian. -French. -Canadian. -French! -Canadian, sir. May I just say, though, that you are a wonderful golfer. And you are a very good caddie. Take off! Paddy, what is wrong with you? Hello. You are two wolves. I have not seen many wolves in these parts. But I am not afraid of wolves. No. I like wolves. Good. 'Cause we just want to ask you a few questions. Yes. Quick! Look behind you! Grab him! So, you want to face the French Resistance? That's French-Canadian! My butt! My butt! My butt! Omegas. This is not a game anymore! Don't you wash your feet? Look out for the trees! Watch that. Nice one, sir. Gotcha. Oh, no. That's got to hurt. How do you like it now, wolf? Hole in one, sir. You have bit off more than you can chew this time, my friend. My goodness. I... Look out for the... No. No. No. No. No. No. He's a goner for sure. Hey, Frank. Okay. You have a question? Yeah. Where are we? Idaho? Ida-who? Oui, Idaho, land of mountains, rivers, lakes, and a few billion potatoes. Sawtooth National Wilderness. What are we doing in Idaho? You were relocated to repopulate. They want you big wolves to make a lot of little wolves. Sounds good to me. Park shouldn't be without some wolves. I mean, only for the good of the park. So you two are undomesticated partners? Paddy, please. Don't be rude. So, you two are boyfriend, girlfriend? You are an item? -Well... -No. You wolves, you are funny. We have to get home now. There's going to be trouble if I don't get back to Jasper. Right. All right. You're freaking out. I'm not freaking out. I just have to get home. -Is this about Barf? -it's Garth. And it's about responsibilities. So, I don't expect you to understand. Can you help me? I need to get home fast. All right, Miss Fast. Where is home sweet home? Jasper Park, Canada. Jasper park? Get out of here. We love Jasper Park! Yes, yes. We've toured it many times. Paddy, please. We've toured it many times. I dated a Pintail from Jasper once. She never stopped quacking. Drove me nuts. Drove her right to me. Bound to happen. Bound to happen. So, you can help me, then, get home. We haven't played Jasper in quite a while. I think it would be a smashing idea. This is true. So, of course I will help. I like you two. You make me laugh. And you didn't eat me, so I owe you favor. Where did she go? Maybe I should ask you. You know that's not my style. My wolf, Can-do, knows your style. I just want to say one thing. If any of you wolves have hurt my daughter, I will personally rip out your eyes and shove them down your throat so you can see my claws tear your carcass open! Mom? Not now, dear. Mommy's in a rage. Well, since Kate stood up Garth, I could show him around until she gets back. I wouldn't say "Stood up." Garth! Sounds good to me. Well, come on, Garth. Isn't that sweet? She gets it from me. I'll give her till the full moon. It is beautiful out there. Almost makes you want to hit the potato patch. If you haven't already hit the outdoors, get on out your door. The weather today is... Your ride home. Quick! Get in! What? Boxed up twice in one day. What are the odds? -Hide! -Hide! That right there is Garn and Debbie Theocarcus. Lucky for you, they travel every year to Jasper right after Sawtooth. The day's looking pretty, and so is my woman. This is the song we met to. Come here, you. Let's dance. -Down here. -Hurry. Now, he was in a motorcycle gang, and she was a librarian. And opposites attract, if you will. Exactly. In this case, it was a bookstore that also sold beer. So, they met. Come on. We have to get in. All right. Here we go. You're just a dream. I'm like a little bunny. Aren't I, dear? I love you, Deb. I love you, too. Get inside now. Get inside. Quick. Well, back in a box. Good luck, you two! We will be watching out for you from above! Well, I'll be watching out for you. He will be breathing heavily. If we have to, we'll fight for the valley. Humphrey? So, why is this called Rabbit Poo Mountain? Because this is where rabbits like to poo. I was just kidding. I get it. You're a funny Omega. Okay. Make me laugh. What am I? You got me. It's a turtle that fell and can't get up. That's pretty good. Okay. What's this? It's turtle road kill. What else can you do? I just do turtles. Okay, it's my turn. You want to see something an Alpha can do? Would my mother approve? Of course. Well, okay then. Keep searching. We must find her before tomorrow night. Winston? Don't worry, Eve. She's the finest Alpha I've trained. I'm not, Winston. She's also the finest Alpha I've ever trained. We stopped. -What's wrong with you? -I have to go. You can't leave. Can't you hold it? No! I can't. Well, did you try crossing your legs? -Yes! -Holding your breath? Yes! I almost passed out. -Closing your eyes and... -In or out, I am going. Would you hurry? I can't go when I feel pressured. Go! What is he doing? Where is he? Come on, Humphrey. It's a rabid wolf! Max, bring that gun! This is it for you, wolf. Any last wishes? Max, theyre getting away! Not if I can help it. -No! -We're trapped. I got you both now. Shoot them! Nicely done, Max. Okay. Thinking with my belly instead of my head, not a good idea. I get it. I say we build a comfy den... -I'm going home. -Great. You're going home, and it's raining. I'm not stopping. Rain, rain, go away Get out of here, rain No one wants you around What are you doing? It's... it's a rain dance, to stop it from raining. 'Cause you're wet And you really are going to ruin our day Humphrey, rain dances make it rain. Right! Well, I'll just do it backwards. That actually worked. Kate? That's not a good idea. Hold on, Kate! No! Hold on, Kate! I'm coming! Let me think. Let me think. Humphrey! Don't worry, Kate. It's all part of my plan. I can see that. Kate. Kate! Grab my tail. Grab your what? Take those Alpha jaws and grab... My tail. My tail. Kate, wiggle. Wiggle around. That tickles. My tail hurts! Who knew I was ticklish there? I can't take any more. My gosh. Humphrey! Humphrey! Your tail. I'm so sorry. My tail's actually fine, last time I checked. Come on. Let's get out of the rain. Okay. Thank you. Sir, we've searched the entire territory. Still no sign of Kate. Sir? We must defend our territory. Fore! Well, well, well. What do we have here? I say, we've caught them at quite the bad time. No, I'd say we caught them at a good time. Indeed, sir. Indeed. What are you doing here? No, the question is what are you doing here? I give you a first class ticket home... It's a straight shot right to the pin. -And you blow it? -Yep. Over a cupcake. Ridiculous dessert. "A cupcake." Actually, they're quite delicious. There has to be another way for us to get to Jasper. Another way? Another way? Always another way. What am I, a travel agent? Come on. What, are you kidding me? A great sportsman like yourself always knows a few ways to win the game. Well, there could be a train. Actually, there is a train. it's the Canadian Express and... Paddy, please. it's called the Canadian Express... Yes, and it shoots right by Jasper Park. Right by Jasper Park. -If you can catch it... -You'll be home in no time. No time. Very fast. Great. So where do we board? Where do you board? Watch this. On the other side of that mountain. Paddy, please. Come on! Let it slip, but may I say, that was a stupendous shot. You may, and it was pretty good, wasn't it? Indeed, sir. Indeed. Dinner for two. It's a new move I've been working on for stalking prey. You're good. Thanks. Now you try. No. I... I'm not much of a hunter. Come on. You'll do great. Just do what I do. Okay. Ready? -One. -One. -Two. -Two. Three! Lilly! Lilly? A turtle, right? -It sure is pretty out there. -Yeah. Maybe this will help. Wow. "Wow" what? Your eyes. They're beautiful. Come on. Let's try again. -It sure is pretty out there. -Yeah. -I'll race you to the top. -You're on. Give it up, Humphrey! You'll never beat me. Humphrey? Omega one, Alpha zero! Okay! Okay! Enough, enough! Stop! Stop! I get it. I get it. I get it. How's that for a girl's throw? Very funny. Well, look who's having fun. You know, I should go check on the train. Wait, wait, wait! Wait, wait. Hi, there. What are you? Well, I'm a wolf. I've never seen a wolf. You are really strange. Am I now? You're totally weird. I'm going to get you! No. Look out! Look out! Okay, you asked for it. No, no, no. it's okay. it's okay. I'm really sorry. Oh, poo. Mad... Mad bear. Kate! Get the snowballs ready! Mad bear on the attack! The Canadian Express! Humphrey, the train is coming! Kate! Humphrey? What's wrong with you? That! Don't move. We can handle this. We can? Okay, we're in trouble. Guys. You guys like jokes? Good. So, okay. So two bears are eating a clown, and one of the bears says, "Does this taste funny to you?" A simple "Boo" would have sufficed. Man. Watch this. One more. One more. Get up. Kate, get up. Where are those two? Why must they make this so difficult? I believe the term is "high maintenance couple," sir. Stuck between the cliffs and the claws. This isn't good. Good luck joking your way out of this one. What's your name, sir? Growl. All right. Do you need a hug? Good talk! Hey, need a ride? Jump! Trust me! I told you, you could trust me. Hang a left! Go right! Why are you looking at me like that? Unbelievable. They have missed the train. Or not. -I know. it's not very good, is it? -Well... That was so awesome. You with the snowballs. And you with that little bear in that snowball fight. It was so cute. But then you with the log! The look on your face was so good. And then we... You know, we make a pretty good team. Kate and Humphrey, world adventurers! What do you think? I think you're crazy. You think I'm... No, I'm telling you, we're onto something here. Stick with me, pup. We'll go places. Well, I'll keep that in mind. All right. Take a deep breath. Howl from right here. And I'll join in. Humphrey, what are you doing? I'm sorry. The moon, the moment. I just thought... Come on, Kate. Howl at the moon with me. See? That's so good. No. You better go. But no one has to know. Please. Go, now. No. Dad. Howling with an Omega, are we? -I was just... -Get with the others. What's going on? We're going to take the valley, and our caribou. -Dad! -Lilly, what's wrong? The Eastern Wolves. They're coming! Come on! Just do it. She howled at the moon with you. That was just the moment. Bonjour, my furry friend. What? Are you guys crazy? That's up for debate. And where is... Mademoiselle. She's sleeping, so be quiet. Yes. Quiet. What are you guys doing here? Making sure that you don't forget the run of the course. Jasper Park, it is a few miles up. Do not miss it. Jasper, few miles, got it. Good. I've got to say, your girlfriend looks quite pretty when she sleeps. She's not my girlfriend. You should work on that. It's the full moon, Winston. I can see that, Tony. I didn't want it to come to this. But here we are. -Stop the insanity! Go organic! -Stop the insanity! Go organic! -Stop the insanity! Go organic! -Stop the insanity! Go organic! -Stop the insanity! Go organic! -Stop the insanity! Go organic! Kate. Kate, wake up. Wake up. Humphrey? Where are we? We're... We're in Jasper. We're home. Yup. We're home. -There's something... -There's something... Please, you first. Humphrey, I just wanted to tell you, these past couple of days, they've been, kind of, fun. You've been, kind of, fun. Really? Really. Well, that's... That's great. I told you, we make a pretty good team. We do. Okay. No, no, no. Don't tell me. You have to go to the bathroom again. Why, do you see a truck stop? I just wanted to tell you I... I... -I... I just wanted to tell you... -No. I... I love... Oh, geez. All I asked was for you to follow our customs, unite the packs. But, no. Your daughter had to up and run away. I didn't run away. Kate! She's back! -We were so worried. -Where have you been? -In Idaho. -Idaho? What were you doing in Idaho? We were taken by humans to another park. We were supposed to repopulate. No, no, no. Mom. We didn't repopulate. Humphrey actually helped me get home. What a nice boy. -I came back... -You came back to marry Garth. Yes. And unite the packs! Good for the pack, good for the belly. Marry? You're getting married? Yes. isn't it great? No more fighting during hunts. No more scraps and bones at dinnertime. We're going to unite the packs. Welcome back, Humphrey. Good job bringing her home. Wow. it's a big crowd. Yeah. Good times. So I heard you and Garth spent some time together. Lilly. Sorry. I'm sure he's perfect marrying material. Well, if you like that sort of thing, big, brawny, and perfect. Lilly, you're wearing your fur back. Sorry. I know. But, I liked it. Right on the pin. Marcel! Paddy! When it comes to hugs, we are all French, Paddy? Well, I'm English, so we don't hug! But for a first, I'd say that was a good one. I'm so happy to see you two. We flew in to see that you made it home. And what do we find? -You're getting married! -You're getting married! Yeah. I'm getting married. -Who told you? -I did. Humphrey. We should be going. Yes, yes. Excuse me. A flea. And a little something for your big day. Thank you. Just wanted to say good-bye. Good-bye? Yeah. I'm thinking about doing a little traveling, you know, seeing where the train takes me. And maybe I'll visit our friends the bears. Our old buddies, see how they're doing. I'll tell them you said hi. Wait. But you're leaving Jasper? Yeah. You know, it's alone wolf thing. I know Humphrey, the fun-loving Omega, not Humphrey, the lone wolf. So I'll be a fun-loving lone wolf. I don't doubt that. You know, Marcel, I am a stickler for tradition, but this one, I just don't understand. These wolves are mysterious creatures. Tony. So... Are you ready? Yes. Good. Are you okay? You bet. No problems on this end. Ready to go, go, go. So, you want to start this thing or me? We'll start together. Start together. Yeah. So, what's happening? They're accepting each other's scent. And now, the nibble on the ears. Do you think I can make it? Yes, sir, and just as you hit the tracks, you should see an open train car. Well, avoid truck stops, bears, and that hideous dessert. What is it called? -Cupcakes, sir. -Yes. Cupcakes. I will. Thanks, guys. You know, you shouldn't be so judgmental about cupcakes. They really are quite delicious. I wouldn't know. And finally, they will rub noses to symbolize that they are mates! Kate, what are you doing? I... I can't. You can't! I mean, you can't? What is this, Winston? Why can't she marry Garth? Quiet. Kate, Kate. Why can't you marry Garth? Because I... I fell in love with an Omega. An Omega? Humphrey? That sly dog! An Alpha in love with an Omega. That's against pack law. Dad. I also am in love with an Omega. What? What have you done to my son, Winston? An Omega and an Alpha? An Alpha and an Omega? Eve, help me out. This is madness. This isn't our custom. This isn't our way. Take the valley! I just love weddings! Stampede! Stampede! Everyone, run! Run! To the sides of the valley! It's that darn disk in my back. Come on! No! They're trapped! Humphrey! Kate! We have to help them! Look! Faster, Tony! Faster! Go left! Roll right! You're getting good at this. I had a good teacher. They're too far ahead. We'll never make it. Hold on. Look! World adventurers. I told you we'd make a good team. Did you say that? I thought I said that. Kate! Kate. Kate. Please, Kate. Please, you can't do this. I love you. Kate! Humphrey? I thought I'd lost you. Is everyone staring at us? Well, no, not... Not every... Well, yeah. Now they are. Darn. 'Cause I wanted to tell you something. What? Really? Okay. Well, I wanted to tell you something, too. Maybe this can work. All right. Garth! Tony, what do two old wolves do after they retire? Gentlemen, may I introduce you to golf? Fore! Yeah, yeah. Oh, that's good. Come on, honey. Let's show 'em how it's done. You ready to shake your tail? Now that's a howl. Are you ready? Yeah. Ready.
Bzzz Bzzz 🐝
- Zed I: The Movie, 2018
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My birth records.
- ^Seemore, p. 356; Butts, pp. 572–577; Poop, p. 94; Face, p. 168
- ^Brandreth, p. 377; Pimlott, pp. 558–559; Roberts, p. 94; Shawcross, p. 204
- ^MY MOM, p. 18; Not funny, pp. 322–345; Didn't, p. 77; Laugh, p. 28
Me. Myself. And I.
- sadly nope,
My mom and dad.
- ^This page exists. That’s the issue.