AB Birch Award

From MicroWiki, the micronational encyclopædia
Jump to navigation Jump to search
AB Birch Award
Satirical Award
Misberia Flag.png
Misberian Flag
Founded 2016
Nominations 106
Other Awards
Higher Honor Order of The Shit

The AB Birch Award or otherwise known as the Archie "Bitch" Birch Award was created in November of 2016 after Mistak and Timberia finally first met. This award is the Misberian equivalent of the Darwin Awards with the added point that it is for stupidity and not for life threatening or bodily harm incidents. The purple toilet seat used in the event is known as Chester and is an unused toilet seat painted a light purple. It is currently ran by The Maritime Republic of The Damariscotta, as the successor to the Misberian Confederacy.


This honor was created in tongue in-cheek was created after the first meeting between Mistak and Timberia. The award has been given out to locals and those who could attend events to receive such an honor and partake in its ceremony. The award has been for locals only since 2016 but has recently been making ground and has started moving to being online as well with Thomas Bainbridge receiving it on June 20th 2020 for his many stupid actions in Misberia and in the GUM. The first Globals AB Birch Awards is due to be announced in the coming weeks.


The following are the rules for this honor, these rules are called the Seven Commandments

  1. Thou shall not nominate thy for dangerous actions
  2. Thou shall not seek thy award
  3. Thou shall not take pictures of videos of thy ceremony
  4. Thou shall nominate thy who is present
  5. Thou shall not harass or bully thy who has received thy award.
  6. Thou shall only nominate thy for events since last award ceremony
  7. Thou must sing thy song loud and proud


The ceremony is split into three parts, the nomination, the voting and finally the singing.


Those who seek to nominate someone for this honor must point out someone who is present and explain to the group what they have done, which was stupid and embellishing a tiny bit of the story to make it funnier is allowed.


Voting is done after nominations are done and the Conductor of the event must rate each nominated member by the sound of the shouting and yelling from the crowd, the one with the loudest crowd response is deemed the winner.


Finally after the winner is decided, the winner must put the purple toilet seat around their neck and must sing the following song,

I was dumb and I should have know what I did would get me here

cha cha cha

I did insert stupid thing and now I am here,

cha cha cha

I stand in front of you, looking like a bitch, who knew Archie would not be here, (Would be here if Archie is the recipient)

cha cha cha

Now I bid you all farewell as I bow my head in shame, until we return here to cheer.

Once the singing is done, the winner removes the toilet seat and the event is officially over.


Many of the winners of this honor from 2016 to 2020 have been lost to time since tracking of the honor has just started, the following are the recent winners and win counts if possible.

Name Date Reason
2016 to 2020 Pre June lost to time
Thomas Bainbridge June 20th 2020 Stupid things in the GUM and in Misberia
Archie Birch July 4th 2020 Got drunk and puked on his dog and announced it to everyone it was a cat
Maria Birch and Joe F July 6th 2020 Screwed up protected sex, now having a baby

Award Counts

Name Award Count Notable Wins
Archie Birch 61 Screamed YEET when throwing a tent pole and it puncturing a boat floor
Thomas Bainbridge 1 Stupid things in the GUM and in Misberia
Maria Birch and Joe F 1 Screwed up protected sex, now having a baby
Maria Birch 28 Screamed at a cop that signing the Directive of Misberia Constitution was not a Crack Deal and started crying as the cop ran over.
Jane Hathaway 15 Almost hit a group of swimmers with her paddle board screaming she could not control where she was going

Other Related Honors

Name Created Last Awarded Recipients
The Order of The Shit July 2nd 2020 July 2nd 2020 Archie Birch